How Do You Build a Real Working Relationship With a Colleague Before Things Get Hard? | Designing the Alliance: A Real Play in Human-to-Human Leadership with Chrissy Bernal and Kaitlin Voellinger
- 12 hours ago
- 4 min read
Summary:
What does it actually sound like when two colleagues sit down and build a real relationship on purpose, before the pressure hits?
This week on The UpLevel Podcast, we step back and let you listen in on a real play. Two colleagues, Kaitlin Voellinger and Chrissy Bernal, are stepping into new roles together at UpLevel, leading marketing and operations side by side. Most teams wait for tension to force this kind of conversation. Kaitlin and Chrissy sit down and design the relationship first.
You'll hear them name what's already working, share the values they want each other to hold onto, and make specific, honest requests about how they want to be supported when things get hard. This is a live demonstration of what conscious leadership sounds like when it moves from concept to practice.
If you've ever slipped into "role to role" mode with a coworker and lost the human connection underneath it, this episode will give you language and a framework to bring it back.
In this episode, you'll hear:
What it sounds like to acknowledge what's already working in a working relationship
How to name and share personal values with a colleague in a way that builds real understanding
A live example of asking for feedback before you need it
How two people negotiate a working agreement for communication, check-ins, and conflict
Why success means pausing to actually feel accomplishment instead of rushing to the next goal
What it means to be a "sounding board" instead of an "echo chamber" for a colleague
If this conversation has you thinking about the relationships you're building at work, The School of UpLevel has on-demand courses designed to help you build these same skills for yourself, from coaching conversations to designing working alliances that actually hold up under pressure. You can explore what's available anytime here: https://course.uplevelproductions.com
Order of Topics:
Human-to-human versus role-to-role communication at work
Naming personal values out loud with a coworker
Building working agreements before conflict happens
Timely communication and not letting tension fester
What psychological safety sounds like in real time
Reciprocity, integrity, and honesty as working values
Redefining success as a shared, relational experience
Action Items:
Name what's already working, out loud.
Before addressing anything that needs to change, tell the person you work with what's going well in the relationship. Kaitlin and Chrissy opened with this, and it set the tone for everything that came after.
Share your top 3-4 values with anyone you're building a working relationship with.
Don't assume the other person already knows what matters to you. Say it plainly, the way Chrissy did with reciprocity, timely communication, and success as a shared experience.
Ask directly how the other person wants to receive feedback.
Build this question into any new working relationship instead of waiting to find out the hard way.
Agree on a "don't let it sit" rule.
Both women committed to reaching out immediately, even briefly, rather than scheduling a conversation for "next week" and letting tension grow in the meantime. Set this expectation with your own collaborators.
Put recurring connection time on the calendar, and protect it.
Their 30-minute, biweekly check-ins weren't just status updates. They were built as a relational space, a "water cooler" moment to ask how the other person is doing personally and professionally.
Ask to be a sounding board, not an echo chamber.
Give the people you work with permission to disagree with you, and take them up on it when they do.
Take a moment to actually feel success before moving to the next thing.
Kaitlin named this as a value: pausing to acknowledge accomplishment, together, instead of rushing straight to the next goal. Build a small ritual for this with your team.
Revisit the agreement; don't just make it once.
Keep checking in on these commitments as part of their regular cadence. Treat working agreements as living, not one-and-done.
About Chrissy and Kaitlin:
Chrissy Bernal is a brand architect and PR strategist who helps entrepreneurs and authors build brands with intention and clarity. Based in the Greater Houston area, she's the founder of Be a Better Brand, where she works with clients on strategic marketing, PR, and brand positioning. Chrissy is also a published author, and her own journey publishing children's books shaped much of her approach to branding, giving her firsthand insight into what it takes to build a message that actually connects. She's a previous guest on The UpLevel Podcast, where she spoke on brand growth and PR for authors, and she brings that same strategic, story-first thinking to her work leading marketing at UpLevel.
Website: https://beabetterbrand.com/
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/chrissybernal/
Kaitlin Voellinger is the Director of Operations at UpLevel, where she brings structure, clarity, and steady presence to the work behind the scenes. She's known for creating safe, supportive spaces for the people around her, whether that's mentoring a colleague through a new challenge or holding the practical details that keep a team moving. Kaitlin leads with integrity and honesty at the center of everything she does, and she believes real success isn't just about hitting a goal. It's about building right relationships along the way and taking the time to actually feel the accomplishment together. She's currently co-leading UpLevel's marketing and operations alliance, bringing the same care and intention to that partnership that she brings to every part of her work.
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/kmaevoellinger/
🎉 The UpLevel Podcast was listed as one of the Top 10 Best Coaching Culture Podcasts!!! https://podcasts.feedspot.com/coaching_culture_podcasts
🎉 It was also ranked #4 among the top 50 Best Workplace Mental Health Podcasts! https://podcast.feedspot.com/workplace_mental_health_podcasts
About UpLevel Productions: Founded by Christie Mann, MA, CPCC, PCC, and Rachel Baldi, CPCC, PCC, UpLevel creates, produces, and delivers Transformative Experiences, Workshops, Training, Events + Media that develop leaders who make our world a healthier, more alive, and connected place to be. As Associate CTI Faculty Partners, UpLevel is licensed to sell, produce, and deliver Co-Active coach training and leadership development programs around the world to support the transformational growth of individuals and culture inside the workplace and organization. www.uplevelproductions.com Instagram @uplevelproductions Facebook & LinkedIn @uplevelproductionscompany
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